But - there is NO law that requires people to be nice.
"No but ..."
"Do I say something degrading about you?"
"No, but I don't feel uplifting, I feel difficult, uncomfortable."
"We need to be polite and discuss matters that may affect our life. Why should I care all the time about how you feel? Why should YOU care all the time about how I feel?
"Because ... ... you need to be nice!"
"Because! ... I'm leaving! You are impossible!"
If someone gets so easily upset, that one simply should not go any close to politics (or management, or any professional field that requires communication with other people, really: for more follow to “Intellectual stagnation, social conformism, and the crisis of logical communication”).
Vodka was cheap, but even it was sold only by leaflets/cards. After standing in a long line to buy our vodka, I went to the city market and tried to sell it for some money or at least to exchange it for some canned food. Some people would like to offer me something else; they would like to get vodka and give me a pair of gloves, or a scarf. When that happened I always said “Thank you, but no, I don't need gloves, or a scarf, I need money or food”.
When people start doing something smart, I will start doing something nice. Until then, all I need to do – always! – is being polite, because that what is required by the law.
Confusion between "polite" and "nice" is not confined by politics, one can see it in science, in business, basically everywhere where people talk. In politics it is called "political correctness", in other spheres it may be called "rudeness", or "cynicism". Unfortunately, this confusion presents a huge obstacle to forging an effective collaboration.
this is one of my favorite Russian wisdoms (more in a different post):
Just one of numerous illustrations how physics is related to the every-day life.
Homework question: why what many of my students think about me is opposite to what many of adults do?
The latest tweet on the matter
This post is a part of a series that also includes: